This is from a man who has chosen to live his life by a righteous code. He used to be what he called “An average married chump” and I would call “A nice guy”.

I was a liar. A dishonest weasel. I lied all the time. Most all of it was so-called “white lies.” And it wasn’t just in relation to my wife, but with my peer group, my work-place colleagues and school classmates…everyone.This was because I lived my life afraid to upset other people. I tried to always find what I mistakenly thought of as the path of least resistance. To use dishonesty to avoid conflict. For instance, if I were invited to participate in something I did not care to, I would scramble for a convenient excuse — A LIE — instead of being honest and straightforward and saying, “no thanks, I’m not interested in doing that.

Fear is never seen as attractive, confident or in control. Honestly is seen as a form of mastery. But you have to have a sense of self integrity to allow this to work. He continues…

The real problem with that is when you spin webs of deceit, you eventually get tangled up and caught. It is inevitable if your whole social life is based on trying to avoid upsetting people by lying to them. And from the perspective of the woman you are having a relationship with, it is the ultimate respect-killer.

He then continues to talk about being a leader — or being a loser. IF you want to be a leader, be honest, unapologetically honest. IF you want to be a leader, be discreet,.

As I wrote earlier though, being honest doesn’t mean you have to tell everyone everything. Circumspect discretion is the easiest means of maintaining a code of living honestly.

Not a gossip, not a weasel. Be responsible. Be a man (or woman) of integrity.

via Hawaiian libertarian: The Primary Trait of the AMC: Fearful Dishonesty.