This is really for the sisters who are struggling with the whisperers who tell them that all will be well if they just leave, or are crying because the man who they want has decided to just go full Roosh and leave.
There is a fear there, and to that fear we must give no room.
Likewise, wives, be subject to your own husbands, so that even if some do not obey the word, they may be won without a word by the conduct of their wives, when they see your respectful and pure conduct. Do not let your adorning be external—the braiding of hair and the putting on of gold jewelry, or the clothing you wear— but let your adorning be the hidden person of the heart with the imperishable beauty of a gentle and quiet spirit, which in God’s sight is very precious. For this is how the holy women who hoped in God used to adorn themselves, by submitting to their own husbands, as Sarah obeyed Abraham, calling him lord. And you are her children, if you do good and do not fear anything that is frightening.
I Peter 3:1-6, ESV
I look at the press and the narrative of this world and all I am seeing is destruction. This is not the way forward. We have to return to our roots in the faith, and that means the word of the LORD.
And here we are told not to fear.
But we are fallen, and we do. If you look at the rates of anxiety disorders among women, they are, at least in the US, Canada, Australia and NZ (and if you believe the epidemiologic surveys) twice as high in women as in men.
Women, do not fear. Yes, the times are fallen. Yes, he could leave: yes there are casualties. But hold to the faith.
And recall that Sarah’s husband was Abraham, who perfect was not.
“This is really for the sisters who are struggling with the whisperers who tell them that all will be well if they just leave”
i wish i could tell her … that it will not all be well … that the real pain begins when the marriage ends, regardless of the abuse or infidelity – especially if there are children … that the knowledge of the good and evil of divorce is not known till that fruit has been consumed, and by then, as it was with Adam and Eve, it’s too late; the damage has been done.
it is beyond hard to live in a bad marriage … i know. but divorce is worse, regardless of who files and leaves, regardless of who caused it if there is one who did … and it doesn’t get better or easier with time. when Jesus said in Matthew 19:6, “So they are no longer two, but one flesh. Therefore what God has joined together, let no one separate.” … Jesus said this b/c He knew … that man truly cannot separate what God has joined. only death can do that. i know. i’ve been there, too. divorce, the legal system, cannot separate what God has joined together.
and the kids … what divorce does to kids. that kind of pain is unbearable without the grace and mercy of God.
i recently had a bible teacher instruct me to read the whole book of 1 Peter ignoring the divisions of verses and chapters, and it was … powerful, hard, humbling, harsh … but true.
we need to become Believers who are willing to hold each other up to obey God … to come along either side and hold each other up like Aaron and Hur did for Moses in Exodus 17. we need to become Believers who encourage and help one another to stay, even when it hurts and is painful, because it’s what God called us to do.
(i must add that i am not a counselor or a professional who deals with abuse. if your life or the lives of your children are in danger, seek professional help immediately.)
…or are crying because the man who they want has decided to just go full Roosh and leave
Something that, in terms of marriages, probably happens in less than three percent of the total.
As for “the whispers,” this nearly ALWAYS takes the form of wifey being pressured or persuaded by her girlfriends who are either miserable, slutty carousel riders who now find it impossible to lock down a man due to their raw promiscuity, or frustrated divorcees who blew up their own marriages on the flimsiest of pretexts, realized too late what a gargantuanly stupid move it was, and are now desperate for company in their misery. The goal of both types of “friend” [sic] is to alienate wifey from hubby, destroy her marriage, and ultimately force her to share their misery and hopelessness by dragging her to the depths of their despair.
Frankly, the fact that wifey would choose to associate with such women at all implies strongly that, –surprise, surprise–, she lacks good judgment or discernment, otherwise known as “hallmarks of adult maturity.” Under the Patriarchy, a husband could –and doubtless usually did– carefully filter his wife’s female associations, ensuring that the likes of slutty carousel riders, frivorcees, and man-hating spinster outcasts (all of which were admittedly rare birds under the Patriarchy, for obvious reasons) got nowhere near her socially. Unless such restrictive practices by husbands can reassert themselves as common practice, feral women will present a constant danger to wives (even “Christian” wives), the majority of whom, unfortunately, clearly lack adult judgment and discernment in the company they keep, with diastrous results ensuing. Let’s just say that I speak from painful past experience here.
feeriker – sadly, this does happen all too often. i am sorry it happened to you 🙁
Right now I am aware of circumstances — where both have happened. This was written in a response to that after I posted the same passage on a private message board.
🙁