Some administrivia: I have added the google comments plugin which allows disqus people to comment. The raw commenting system was throwing people out for insecure tokens (which is annoying: it did it to me when I used my twitter account). Thanks to Will S and SSM for the feedback on comments over the last couple of days.
The weekend is almost on us, and (since I had a birthday this week and am now 53), when Psalm 88 is read it now resonates.
PSALM 88:1-5
1 O LORD, God of my salvation,
when, at night, I cry out in your presence,
2 let my prayer come before you;
incline your ear to my cry.
3 For my soul is full of troubles,
and my life draws near to Sheol.
4 I am counted among those who go down to the Pit;
I am like those who have no help,
5 like those forsaken among the dead,
like the slain that lie in the grave,
like those whom you remember no more,
for they are cut off from your hand.
However, we should continue with the teaching from Corinthians. And in this passage is the Christian response to both the PUAs and the Feminists. It is the teaching of the tradosphere, and it is offensive to feminists and the spirit of the age. For they see this as sexist. They see this as rapey. And they cannot understand celibacy, or fidelity, or honour.
1Now concerning the matters about which you wrote: “It is well for a man not to touch a woman.” 2But because of cases of sexual immorality, each man should have his own wife and each woman her own husband. 3The husband should give to his wife her conjugal rights, and likewise the wife to her husband. 4For the wife does not have authority over her own body, but the husband does; likewise the husband does not have authority over his own body, but the wife does. 5Do not deprive one another except perhaps by agreement for a set time, to devote yourselves to prayer, and then come together again, so that Satan may not tempt you because of your lack of self-control. 6This I say by way of concession, not of command. 7I wish that all were as I myself am. But each has a particular gift from God, one having one kind and another a different kind.
8To the unmarried and the widows I say that it is well for them to remain unmarried as I am. 9But if they are not practicing self-control, they should marry. For it is better to marry than to be aflame with passion.
The times are evil, and there are cases of sexual immorality in the church. Given the current public orgies (called gay pride and slut parades, or hollywood based celebrations — I never thought that the mid game shows would need an R16 label) it’s best that one marries, unless one is gifted with celibacy.
Which I am not. As a single man, this is not easy.
But in marriage the clear teaching is that the couple should go for it. They should deal with each other’s sexual needs — if one is horny, the other should say yes. So the lustful desires are slaked.
Or, there is no “NO” in marriage, sexually: unless the act is intrinsically immoral, such as adultery (and there is a debate on this, but the older church had clear teaching, enshrined in the old sodomy laws) one should say yes. (And if one cannot because of illhealth, one should (ahem) talk about how you will still remain a sexual couple through the illness).
You can hear the howls from the churchians, who have to sacrifice the idea that they will be continually romanced and will be able to withold: that they will have to put up with an Aussie seduction (“Let’s do it”) and that they will have to acknowledge that they are just as likely to be randy as their husbands. This teaching is anti feminist.
(If you don’t believe people hate this, go back and read the comments from the politically correct that invade SSM (and used to invade TC) all to frequently).
To those who dislike this teaching, the correct response is… “So?”. Guys who can easily get women (alphas) don’t like this because it stops them having multiple lovers, and tells them to attend to but one woman, and bond with them.
For in marriage, you are called to be one flesh. And if your marriage breaks, as mine did, you will find that this is no mere analogy: it feels like your arm and leg are amputated: (you may be more healthy because the gangrene is gone, but you are left with continual phantom pain).