Today’s text is basically a list of names. It’s one of those texts which people have distorted: because Paul lists both men and women, Greeks, Jews and Romans (you can tell by the way the names are written who is who: Herodian is clearly noted to be a brother, and Mary was a common name at the time for Jews but not Roman matrons).
Some say that all these people must be leaders, because Paul mentioned them. Those people are missing the forest, looking at the trees. Paul mentioned those he knew: some clearly had ministry, some, like Rufus and his mother, had cared for him.
I commend to you our sister Phoebe, a servant of the church at Cenchreae, that you may welcome her in the Lord in a way worthy of the saints, and help her in whatever she may need from you, for she has been a patron of many and of myself as well.
Greet Prisca and Aquila, my fellow workers in Christ Jesus, who risked their necks for my life, to whom not only I give thanks but all the churches of the Gentiles give thanks as well. Greet also the church in their house. Greet my beloved Epaenetus, who was the first convert to Christ in Asia. Greet Mary, who has worked hard for you. Greet Andronicus and Junia, my kinsmen and my fellow prisoners. They are well known to the apostles, and they were in Christ before me. Greet Ampliatus, my beloved in the Lord. Greet Urbanus, our fellow worker in Christ, and my beloved Stachys. Greet Apelles, who is approved in Christ. Greet those who belong to the family of Aristobulus. Greet my kinsman Herodion. Greet those in the Lord who belong to the family of Narcissus. Greet those workers in the Lord, Tryphaena and Tryphosa. Greet the beloved Persis, who has worked hard in the Lord. Greet Rufus, chosen in the Lord; also his mother, who has been a mother to me as well. Greet Asyncritus, Phlegon, Hermes, Patrobas, Hermas, and the brothers who are with them. Greet Philologus, Julia, Nereus and his sister, and Olympas, and all the saints who are with them. Greet one another with a holy kiss. All the churches of Christ greet you.
(Romans 16:1-16 ESV)
We could debate how the church is governed for hours: there have been wars and alliances made on these issues, as the bloody endgame of the English Civil War and the Scottish Covenanters showed us 400 years ago. What we do know is that this group were small (but growing) and probably met in houses. The text indicates that some groups were based around families (such as Narcissus and his family).
It is also true, and Paul wrote clearly on this, that women taught women, as was their duty, in part because keeping a house was more than a full-time job. Also because women are (Praise God, for otherwise life would be boring) not like men. They see things differently: they get offended when they wander into men talking — the brevity, the lack of concern for how the others feel gets in their way — and most of us have learned to censor what we say in public because causing offence every second is tiring.
But taking this text as a proof that there were women Paul knew and therefore they must be in leadership is pushing things too far. Most of us do not qualify for leadership: it is a great burden, and that is before the Roman Church(1) bought in a requirement that all priests be celibate, which disqualifies many. For not all are called to be monks. Some have to raise the next generation.
What matters more is what you are doing now. Your title avails you to little unless you can lead. It’s better to be effective.
There are many Marys (2) in the Bible. And at least two Herods (3). There are not a few Joshuas and Judahs — Hellenized to Jesus or Judas. Iscariot needed a second name for a reason.
Paul was greeting those whom he knew were doing work for the LORD. The list is not exclusive to these people. Let us aim to be on the complete list.
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1, I am not a Roman Catholic: but in the Presbyterian Church no person can be an elder unless either in holy celibacy or a loving and faithful marriage between man and woman. The other qualifications in Titus exclude most who are indeed married or in holy celibacy.
2. Mary the mother of our LORD and wife of Joseph, Mary the mother of James and John, Mary of Magdalene, Mary the sister of Martha, and this Mary in Rome. I’ve probably missed a few.
3. Herod the Great killed the children in Bethlehem (the Massacre of the Innocents) at the time of the birth of Jesus, and his descendant was involved in the Crucifixion. I’m not sure if the same Herod died when he accepted being proclaimed a God. It was a dynastic name, as much a title as an indication of membership in a clan.