And most churches had a bit of that within them: because the church is the instrument of Christ and the way to salvation (and to quote the Church fathers — if you are not in a Church you are not of Christ) excommunication and shunning had effect. But when you turn the gospel into a watered down buddhist narrative and have no church discipline then the memes of the world trump the teaching of the church.

And this world calls marriage a sexual union, for pleasure, that is fungible. The church calls it holy, righteous, and for the raising of Godly children: a holy work, a worthwhile vocation. The church is more realistic: for within marriage and raising a family there are many tears and multiple frustrations.

But in steadfastness and fidelity to your word you will reap joy. The joy you see in the Godly long married, and the joy I lost when my marriage imploded.