There is apparently a meme out there that suggests that if you don’t succeed, try again. That there is another Mr or Ms Right for you regardless of what you have done. And that you are eternally as desireable as you were in early adulthood.
Men know that is not the case, but women… less so. They are angry for God that, having shattered their vows once, twice, thrice, there are now no new takers. The older man (Ladies, double your age and add subtract seven. That is the age you are equivelant to) looks at the track record. Because crazy is not compensated by a beauty. Even if you are one of those psychopaths Angelina Jolie keeps on playing. Because, even then, the crazy will out.
As an aside, I can say that as a man, there is something subtle about what makes one woman more attractive than another of roughly equal physical gifts. The woman who is graceful, at ease and satisfied with life has an appeal that is conspicuously absent in a woman who is frustrated and tense. I’ve seen technically “hot” women who, because of the hostility and dissatisfaction that emanates from them, have very little, if any, sex appeal. Makeup is designed to give a woman that healthy “glow” that characterizes the harmonious woman, but it’s a substitute that can’t make up for the real thing.
I could sign on to monasteries. With the collapse of marriage, there’s a horde of honorable, hard-working men with little or no family and little status in the local, family-centric churches. Providing a home for Christian non-Alphas and giving them plenty of good manual labor sounds appealing. If we can’t fix marriage than a monastic movement could help us wait out the collapse… and rebuild society on our terms, not the United Nations’.
Nunneries won’t work for these feral women, however. They don’t want what they need. That alone explains a lot of hamsterizing.
Protest at school of 13k students got 50 to show up pic.twitter.com/oT8UkPgAvt
— SOBL1 (@SOBL1) September 3, 2014
Yes the memes of the Baby boomers are fading, but they still exist.
Sarah Hoyt has just called her Mom in the old country, and wonders what happened to the standards of her youth. I think her thesis that the Middle class morality was there to protect women and children was and is correct: it allowed for functional families that are somewhat sane.
“@KATEHAWKESBY: Another busy morning in Remuera. pic.twitter.com/d01KhQgfRT” At first glance he looks like a really relaxed vandal!
— Local Auckland (@LocalAuckland) September 2, 2014
The “middle class” standards weren’t there because people were perfect, or because people wanted to look down on those who failed to keep them. At least in my experience we were not puritans, and no one got branded with a scarlet letter. Yes, the people in the village (particularly the old women) glared at anyone they thought was doing anything wrong, but give it enough time and a slip up would be forgiven, if you went ahead and kept the standards in everything else.The standards were there, evolved over time, because they protected women and children. A man who left his wife for the new new thing was as looked down upon (and possibly smacked) as a woman who slept with married men and lured them away from their wives. That meant when you were older, and you gained a little weight (who am I kidding? Mediterranean. We explode outward and grow a mustache!) your husband was encouraged to stay with you anyway, and your kids had their parents together to look up to, and you had someone to look after you in your old age. That meant if a man did you “an injury” and it could at all be managed, he married you and supported the kid. And if (we weren’t Jane Austen either) it was clearly statutory rape or any other form of rape, very often someone else who hadn’t dared approach would step up to keep up appearances or the child would be found a family, and you took a visit to the country and came back, miraculously still a virgin. It meant that young men who loitered idly living off a woman’s income, be she mother, mistress or wife, got the glare and hints to shape up, and fell at least for a while out of the “decent folk” category.
Restrictive? Of course they were. The standards were supposed to be restrictive. They were a rail that kept you from losing track and living out in the wilderness, with no protection.
Most of the standards were to protect women, though I suppose the ones relating to honesty in your dealings also protected men – at least in business. And the ones about respecting your elders meant that one school mistress could hold 30 unruly teenagers under her spell.
But mostly it was there to protect women and children, to provide them with face-saving stories, with ways to go on living “decent middle class lives.”
The scriptural answer is to let God sort it out and be gracious to each other. Not to look for perfection, but instead towards a growing in grace.
Micromanagement is so ugly. And half the time, when a man tells a woman to just accept it, he is talking about her need to control coming forward.
Prince of Wales writes impassioned letter to Christians in Iraq. Read in full: http://t.co/owRkByFaZ7 (Pic: AP) pic.twitter.com/ZIWiPZnmDG
— The Telegraph (@Telegraph) September 3, 2014
